Technology, Children and Social Skills

For the 16^th Annual Education issue of Northern Connection magazine, I started the conversation on technology, children and social skills. I made the point that in many cases, we, as adults, can be just as bad as any child when it comes to using technology. Afterall, no one under 16 has ever been in a driving accident for texting. But then I wondered how do we set our own boundaries as well as boundaries for our children and how do we make dedicated face time for one-on-one relationships without slighting everyone else we are connected to?

One example of a rule that I gave is that instead of money for chores, children earn “digital time” on any device they choose. For example, cleaning their room or unloading the dishwasher might earn your children 15 – 30 minutes on their gaming system. Which may work for children, but what should we, as adults, do to maintain our social skills?

I know several couples that when they go out to dinner, they all pile up their cell phones in the middle of the table and the first to reach for his or hers, has to pick up the tab. Unless, they all make it to the end of dinner, and in which case, they simply split the bill.

But what do you think of rudeness for a techno fix? Do you have any suggestions for our readers? Feel free to leave comments below or email me at northcon@consolidated.net.

Social Media: Friend or Foe?

What is your opinion of Social Media? We ‘Started the Conversation’ on social media in this month’s edition of Northern Connection magazine. There is no doubt that it is here to stay but how do you teach children and teens to not talk, text, chat, or meet strangers? One rule we have is that everyone can only post past events. For example, “We went on vacation…”, “I went to the mall…”, and so forth, so no one knows the house was empty.

Another rule we have is the golden rule of, “if you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all”, which is very difficult when so many people feel so comfortable in being rude on social media and write nasty things that they would never say in a face-to-face conversation. Leading to having to resist the temptation to retaliate and “turn the other cheek” instead.

Also in the article, we mention, if you are mean out in cyberspace, you can be in jeopardy of being criminal, according to new laws and adaptations to existing laws against harassment and stalking. So be aware that if someone is cruel to you or your child online, you and your child have rights! Check out http://www.ncsl.org/research/telecommunications-and-information-technology/cyberstalking-and-cyberharassment-laws.aspx, to learn more.

In doing research for this article and blog, three great teens that I happen to know informed me that since all the parents are on Facebook and Twitter, they have started hanging out in other sites, such as:

www.Instagram.com – more photo and video intensive than Facebook and Twitter, it streamlines getting impromptu pictures without as much text and then it is easy to share out the pictures or videos that you want to Facebook.

www.Pinterest.com – this site really helps you organize any content that you have found on the web so you can come back to it and relocate it in a snap – it is infinitely more efficient than just saving out “favorites” in your web browser.

www.Snapchat.com – similar to Instagram, it came with the promise of photos only lasting 30 minutes and then they’ll auto-delete. Unfortunately, this is NOT entirely true and people have been hurt because if a so-called friend sees it during that 30 minutes and downloads it, then they can share it out to Facebook or wherever they want and you have no control over it.

www.Spotify.com – this is the ultimate in managing your music via playlists. You can upload your own playlists but you can also access all the other playlists that have been uploaded to find various kinds of music and genres and people can access your list, as well.

www.Tumblr.com – an “edgy” version of Facebook – this has become a big favorite among teens.

www.Vine.com – recently purchased by Facebook, Vine is similar to Instagram but with more of a focus on short videos.

www.YikYakApp.com – similar to Facebook and Pinterest but it is a public bulletin board that is based on your location – so you see the posts of people physically near you and they can see your posts. Supposedly streamlining what you see, relevant to your area. (Personally, I think this is a bit close for comfort – but is that me?)

If you want more statistics on people using the Internet for social media, check-out: http://www.pewinternet.org/fact-sheets/social-networking-fact-sheet/

As always, we are very interested in your comments and opinions, so let’s continue the conversation and please enter your thoughts in the comment section below, Is Social Media Friend or Foe? (Also, don’t forget to subscribe to this blog, “like” us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/northernconnection and follow us on Twitter at @NConnectionMag https://twitter.com/NConnectionMag  and look for more Northern Connection in social media outlets.